It is easy to fall in love with Mumbai. It is a fantastic place to live, it is liberal, warm, welcoming, secular and forgiving. The city is much like a Backstreet Boy; it doesn’t care who you are, where you're from or what you did, if you want in, you're more than welcome. But having said that, there are a few things that you should never pull off in Mumbai. 1. Never call a hawaldar, “aye, Pandu!” or else... 2. Never walk on the street without looking where you step, or else... 3. Never cut in line for the trial room at a Zara sale, or else... 4. Never buy ‘Bisleri’ water at a traffic signal, or else... 5. Ladies, this one’s for you: Never travel in the gent’s compartment of a Virar local train during rush hour, or else... 6. Never tease or throw stones at the monkeys in Borivali National Park, or else... 7. Never drink Neera at 5 pm at Dadar Station, or else... 8. Never get all up in a hijra’s face, or else... 9. Never go to Cafe Mondegar and ask for a Jain Pav Bhaji, or else... 10. Never wear a red tie or red handkerchief and stand near Gateway of India or Radio Club, or else... 11. Never make out on the rocks at Carter Road/Bandstand, or else... 12. Never walk barefeet on Juhu/Versova/Chowpatty/Gorai/Manori beach, or else... 13. Never eat missal or ussal pav before going to work, or else... 14. Never wear your best pair of shoes when you visit Siddhi Vinayak or Mahalakshmi temple, or else... 15. Never venture out for a walk in Shivaji Park on December 6th, or else... 16. Never say this to girl from Mumbai, “Can I make fraansheep with yew”, or else... 17. Never piss off a Koli fisherwoman, or else... 18. Never go for midnight mass thinking you can patao chicks, or else... 19. Never venture out of your house when the Shiv Sena/MNS calls for a bandh, or else... 20. Never call ‘26407383 Beanbags’, or else... *Inspired by this awesome post.