#OMGLOLWTF: 20 Things You Should Never Try To Pull Off In Mumbai

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It is easy to fall in love with Mumbai. It is a fantastic place to live, it is liberal, warm, welcoming, secular and forgiving. The city is much like a Backstreet Boy; it doesn’t care who you are, where you're from or what you did, if you want in, you're more than welcome. But having said that, there are a few things that you should never pull off in Mumbai. 1. Never call a hawaldar, “aye, Pandu!” or else...
Pandu mat kaho na
Pandu mat kaho na, Image Courtesy - makeagif.com
2. Never walk on the street without looking where you step, or else...
Now you see me, now you don't
Now you see me, now you don't, Image Courtesy - ohmagif.com
3. Never cut in line for the trial room at a Zara sale, or else...
I keel you
I keel you, Image Courtesy - gifsoup.com
4. Never buy ‘Bisleri’ water at a traffic signal, or else...
Diahorrea
Diahorrea , Image Courtesy - giffer.com
5. Ladies, this one’s for you: Never travel in the gent’s compartment of a Virar local train during rush hour, or else...
How YOU Doin?
How YOU Doin? Image Courtesy - retro-fiend.tumblr.com/‎
6. Never tease or throw stones at the monkeys in Borivali National Park, or else...
Monkey attack
Monkey attack, Image Courtesy - http://lawebloca.net/
7. Never drink Neera at 5 pm at Dadar Station, or else...
Fuck yeah!
Fuck yeah!, Image Courtesy - giftube.com
8. Never get all up in a hijra’s face, or else...
When Trannies Attack
When Trannies Attack, Image Courtesy - gifsoup.com
9. Never go to Cafe Mondegar and ask for a Jain Pav Bhaji, or else...
Totes Judging You
Totes Judging You, Image Courtesy - giphy.com
10. Never wear a red tie or red handkerchief and stand near Gateway of India or Radio Club, or else...
Tu cheez badi hai mast-mast
Tu cheez badi hai mast-mast, Image Courtesy - imgflip.com
11. Never make out on the rocks at Carter Road/Bandstand, or else...
Surprise Wave Fail
Surprise Wave Fail, Image Courtesy - gifbin.com
12. Never walk barefeet on Juhu/Versova/Chowpatty/Gorai/Manori beach, or else...
Pile-o-poop
Pile-o-poop, Image Courtesy - reactiongifs.us
13. Never eat missal or ussal pav before going to work, or else...
Nuclear Farts
Nuclear Farts, Image Courtesy - giphy.com
14. Never wear your best pair of shoes when you visit Siddhi Vinayak or Mahalakshmi temple, or else...
Chura Liya Hai Tumne...
Chura Liya Hai Tumne...Image Courtesy - giphy.com
15. Never venture out for a walk in Shivaji Park on December 6th, or else...
Mosh Pit Murder
Mosh Pit Murder, Image Courtesy - giphy.com
16. Never say this to girl from Mumbai, “Can I make fraansheep with yew”, or else...
Indian Krav Maga
Indian Krav Maga, Image Courtesy - imgflip.com
17. Never piss off a Koli fisherwoman, or else...
Fish Slap
Fish Slap, Image Courtesy - tumblr.com
18. Never go for midnight mass thinking you can patao chicks, or else...
OMFG
OMFG, Image Courtesy - pandawhale.com
19. Never venture out of your house when the Shiv Sena/MNS calls for a bandh, or else...
How DARE!
How DARE! Image Courtesy - giphy.com
20. Never call ‘26407383 Beanbags’, or else...
Prostitute?!
Prostitute?! Image Courtesy - wordpress.com
*Inspired by this awesome post.

Amanda Ferrao

Amanda Ferrao
Escaped the big bad world of advertising after being held hostage for 10 years. Consecutively developed Stockholm Syndrome and guiltily tries to justify its awesomeness. Sarcasm-enthusiast. Recovering online shopping addict. Self-proclaimed crazy cat lady. Will write for shoes.